Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Working Mom
Sometimes I feel the little guilty pangs of being a working mom. I don't work that much - two 4-hour mornings each week. Cohen goes to a friend's house one day a week. The other day, he comes with me. It has worked out so far and I really enjoy working - I get out of the house a little bit and I get a small break from being a mom. However, the past couple of weeks have been a little off. I've been taking Cohen into work with me more and more. Here are the differences I've noticed. 1) I don't get as much work done. Working with a toddler around is difficult. I'm not an effective nor efficient employee and I hate that! 2) I'm not a nice mom when Cohen is at work with me. I'm always worried that something is going to break or that he is going to fall or blah, blah, blah. 3) I allow Cohen to get away with things at work that I wouldn't let him get away with at home. For example, he watches a movie on the dvd player about 80% of the time that he is at work with me. That's a lot. Also, he eats the ENTIRE TIME we are there. My kid eats a lot of food anyway, but we usually stick to some sort of schedule: breakfast, snack time, lunch, snack time, dinner. At work it is snack time all of the time. Soon, he'll be coming into work with me every day, because my friends are moving. This means that my break from being a mom goes out the window - I'll just be going from "regular mom" to "mean mom" depending on whether or not I work that day. It shouldn't be like that. I don't know if there is a solution. Maybe I needed to vent. Maybe I needed to put my "feel sorry for me" vibe out into the web universe (like it is even a valid problem - there are so many other things for people to worry about). Maybe I need a change.
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5 comments:
You know, I went through the mom/work quandary, although different from your situation. I was working 2 half days and leaving Nathan with a sitter. I always felt horrible leaving him, although he was in fine care, and it seemed like he was thrown completely off schedule on the days I worked, which drove me insane.
However, I loved the break in my own schedule and now that I am no longer working I actually really miss the me-time, since I have had absolutely zero in about 3 months now. It's so hard, too, when you find yourself in a situation where you have to compromise everything you are trying so hard to instill in the little one (pregnancy - if it's a little rough - does this too, btw).
If I wasn't about to pop, I'd volunteer to take Cohen off your hands for those mornings...I've still got 6ish weeks, so you can take me up on it once or twice if you need to...otherwise, I understand the need to vent.
I feel the guilt of being a working mommy too. I hate how it effects my personality and mommying. I'm just glad Chiara won't remember these days. Hang in there, Mandy.
i understand...and i am at home, but i have other people's kids here. i hate having to tell aron to be quiet because i am trying to put the other kid down or letting him watch so many shows because i am trying to feed or put other kids to bed. hang in there, we are all feeling guilty, isn't that what good mothers do? and then we tell out kids our hardships when they get older so they can feel bad and spend more time with us??? my mom does that great!
I know the dilemma!
I certainly have my own working mommy story but only YOU know what is right for YOUR family! :)
Good Luck!
So, the Titeras are the only people qualified to watch Cohen? hmmmph!
I don't think 8 hrs in 168 are going to ruin all that you teach him, whether you are spoiling him at work or leaving him with someone else. You need the break- I am sure you can find someone else to watch him (like moi!)
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